In this week’s episode of the Mindful Loving Project Podcast, I interviewed Relationship Recovery Coach, Inna Mel. Inna shares her personal story of overcoming unhealthy relationship dynamics, stating that she (like I), dated people consistently and never really had any break in between to really get to know herself and what she wanted in life & in love. So many of us feel this need to stay in relationships because of what’s “expected of us” from our families, our culture or societal conditioning, but if we’re genuinely not satisfied with where we are, our bodies will communicate that discomfort in the form of mental disturbance.
After a painful break-up, with someone in which she and her family thought she would marry, Inna took 2 years off and went on a self-discovery journey–traveling the world and getting to know more of herself and her interests. This is where Inna did a lot of internal work, seeking therapy and coaching, as well as doing much research on things such as Attachment Theory, behavioral patterns and unconscious reconditioning. Through her own healing process, she discovered her passion for helping others on a similar path.
Now although this journey was enlightening (and necessary) in so many ways, it was also very challenging. I personally could completely understand where Inna was coming from in terms of the inner struggles she endured during those single years. Because after being emotionally dependent on someone for most of your life, going out into the world as a single person (especially a single woman) can feel really scary. In our minds, nobody is thinking about us, nobody is there to catch us if we fall, and therefore our existence seems so minimal in contrast to the vast world. And so many people don’t take that chance on themselves because that idea is too risky or too frightening for them.
But guess what? The reality is YOU WILL SURVIVE and that your life will be SO MUCH MORE beautiful and empowered when you take that chance on yourself.
Remember, our inner critics job is to keep us safe. This is why we will stay in perhaps stale or unhealthy relationship dynamics just because we know what to expect from them, it’s predictable. However, if you break loose and create a new reality for yourself, that uncertainty is what causes the our inner critic to react by bombarding us with fearful throughs so that we don’t take a change and possibly “get hurt”. But if we don’t take a chance, we will never know what was right over that tiny hill.
Our goal in life is to transcend the inner critic so that we can experience more freedom, peace of mind, love, joy and personal fulfillment.
LISTEN TO THE PODCAST
Do you struggle with the “mean inner voice” inside your head? Learn exactly how to begin separating yourself from your inner critic in order to experience more peace of mind, love, freedom and personal fulfillment!